Description A Word from the Author: Before It's Too Late, For the True Happiness of Your Family CHAPTER 1: I Never Taught My Child to Love Themselves Words that erase presence: "Your friend means so much to you" — Help your child protect themselves before their friends. Words that take away what matters: "It's nothing, just let them have it" — Teach your child to stand up for their fair interests. Words that create self-consciousness: "Who would like you if you act like this?" — Teach your child to be true to themselves. Words that misplace the blame: "It's because you didn't try hard enough" — Ease your child's guilt. Words that build emotional walls: "What exactly are you lacking?" — A parent's role goes beyond providing materially. CHAPTER 2: I Only Loved Half of My Child Words that suppress emotion: "What's there to be embarrassed about? Speak up bravely" — Acknowledge feelings instead of pressuring them. Words that demand false emotions: "Even if you're sad, hold it in" — Embrace even the difficult emotions. Words that push emotions aside: "How dare you get angry?" — Acknowledge the feeling, but set limits on the behavior. Words that restrict: "Don't yell, don't cry, stop it" — Raise a child who feels safe expressing themselves. CHAPTER 3: I Mistakenly Thought My Child Was Being Rude Words that provoke hostility: "Don't you know any manners? Do you think your parents are a joke?" — Give your child the experience of being respected. Words that shut down conversation: "You shouldn't have done that" — Ask gentle, open questions instead. Words that force a response: "What do you mean you don't know?" — Wait until your child is ready to speak on their own. CHAPTER 4: I Said Many Things That Backfired Words that attack self-esteem: "See, I told you so" — Focus on the future instead of the past. Excuses that lead to unhappiness: "I did it all for you" — Recognize that parents are imperfect too. Nagging that kills appetite: "Why won't you eat your vegetables? They're good for you" — Children eat vegetables more willingly when not forced. Words that cause humiliation: "Just do as you're told" — Help your child understand the reasons behind the rules. CHAPTER 5: I Taught My Child to Live in Fear Words that threaten abandonment: "Mommy's leaving without you" — Don't turn your child into an anxious, fearful person. Words that make life feel frightening: "You'll ruin your life if you keep this up" — Discipline while helping them keep a positive sense of self. Words that make a child shrink back: "The world is a scary place" — Warn them, but also give them confidence that they can handle challenges. CHAPTER 6: I Made My Child's Appearance Worries Worse Words that create complexes: "Sweetheart, you're not very pretty" — Criticizing your child's looks is never okay. Words that distort values: "My daughter is the prettiest!" — Teach that charm comes from more than looks. Words that dismiss curiosity about appearance: "You're too young to care so much about how you look" — Allow some room for this natural curiosity. Nagging that causes stress: "You'll get fat if you eat too much" — Encourage confident eating along with healthy moderation. CHAPTER 7: I Insulted My Child Without Realizing It Words that attack the person: "You did it again?" — Focus on the present and future, not past mistakes. Words that demean character: "How many times do I have to tell you?" — Speak with appeal, not insult. Words that unfairly accuse: "All you do is play games?" — Exaggerating problems never helps. Words that subtly insult: "Are you stupid or something?" — Check whether your words carry a hidden sting. CHAPTER 8: What I Regret Most Is Hitting and Scolding Words that ruin a child's life: "Do you need to be hit to learn?" — Words are stronger than a switch. Verbal abuse as painful as physical punishment: "You're a hopeless case" — Parents must learn to manage their own emotions. Words that accomplish nothing: "I'll make a proper person out of you" — Wait patiently with generous understanding and optimism. Words that can be worse than strictness: "Fine, do whatever you want" — Balance freedom with structure. CHAPTER 9: I Didn't Know How to Give Love Words that create passivity: "Finish the book and I'll give you a kiss" — Don't attach conditions to love. Words that instill guilt: "I'm completely disappointed in you" — Ask yourself if your expectations are too high. Words that prevent full joy: "Good job, but..." — Give your child praise without qualifications. Words that make a child a liar: "Why can't you keep your promises?" — Set promises together, with your child's agreement. CHAPTER 10: I Damaged My Child's Self-Esteem